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Archives of Parenting

Martial Arts for Teens - South East Self Defence


TRAIN TO WIN – GO TO LEARN When you first talk to competitors about this philosophy they think you don’t want them to win or that you are trying to make excuses for your inability to help them win. THAT COULDN’T BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH. When people put so much weight on a result, […]
Jujitsu Kids shaking hands


We are going to explore the nature of competition and put some frame work around it. Maybe this will be the first time you will look at competition this way. When I ask people about competition and what they think it means, mostly they drift towards looking at it from the perspective of teams playing […]


A lot of people come to our Martial Arts school to learn how to or work on building their confidence. Over the years some things have become very apparent to me and I would like to share them. Confidence is, according to the dictionary – Confidence definition, full trust; belief in the powers, trustworthiness, or […]


There is a saying that you will be the average of the 3 people you associate with in a given area. I can testify to the accuracy of this statement, in my life at least. It was only in my forties that I realised that my life had been kind of moulded by the people […]


Before any race or game a professional athlete will run that race or play that game 100’s of times in their mind first. A runner will set up at the end of the track and run the race through visualisation time and time again. Noticing the power with which their legs are used to propel […]

G.R.O.W. your Goal

Now we have a goal its time to GROW it. This 4 step process allows you to move on even the smallest of goals. To GROW our goal we have to have a GOAL, Then we need to have a REALITY check, then notice our OPPORTUNITIES and lastly find a WAY FORWARD. Lets look at it […]


In the title I’ve taken a slogan for sport which is designed to encourage positive interaction between players, spectators and officials for the benefit of the sport. This title equally suits goal setting as well. It is really important to state your goal in a positive framework. Your mind is going to go to work […]
Martial Arts for Juniors - South East Self Defence

Conflict management using bridging tools

We recently e explored “funny word blocks” to help students find a way to bridge conflict and bullying. This isn’t avoiding conflict but taking the opportunity to move past useless and un-resourceful conversations or comments without anger. Some things are just not worth getting involved in but in the middle of bullying or abuse we […]

How to say sorry

It became plain to me that what the survivors were asking for but didn’t feel like they were getting is exactly in the formula we use for an apology. They were asking for their emotions to be noticed, they were asking for an apology and they were asking for it to be fixed. And I […]

Saying yes to everything a child wants

Saying Yes to everything your child wants will not make them happy Are you a person that can’t say” no” to your child or are you one that always says “no”. In Jujitsu we teach to go with effort, to give way. But not to give in. I found saying no to the emotional professional […]
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